...black beans.
After my second Dr. appointment for relentless ringworm, I take Sylvie-Aganoti to lunch at a Mexican restaurant. As I order, the burrito-guy says with a smirk on his face, "Let me guess... ...black beans."
Maybe because I am wearing a black shirt and vest.
Maybe because I look like someone who likes black beans.
Maybe because I am holding an Ethiopian baby.
Maybe this guy is a complete ass.
Maybe not.
Three months ago I would have thought the burrito-guy was quirky and nothing more. I find with Sylvie-Aganoti in my arms the world looks a bit different. People's comments sound different.
Surprised and trying to give him the benefit of the doubt, I say, "No thank you, pinto beans." Retrospectively, I could have asked, "Why would you guess black beans?". I wonder what he would have said?
If he was making a racially-charged comment, what was his purpose? Did he think it was funny? Did he intend to be nasty? This three-second incident has stuck with me for hours. I keep thinking about how this will feel for S.A. when she is old enough to realize the hang-ups some people have with ethnicity and non-traditional families.
I am hopeful that the burrito-guy did not mean anything by his comment. Though, sadly, my gut says otherwise. I wish I could turn back the clock and handle things differently.
Maybe I would stick a bean up his nose...
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7 comments:
And would you stick a black bean up his nose or a pinto bean? Sorry...I'm cracking up about that. But you're right, the world does look a little different now.
oooh. It would be hard for me to resist calling back to the resturant, and asking out of curiosity who was the waiter at that time...and ask to talk to him.
Then have a little chat with the manager..in a kind a civil tone.
Girl, you are SO very, very right. The world does look different now. But, why on Earth would he say that? I still think that I'm naive. I just don't get people!! Makes me want to smack him tho. I'm going to choose to believe that it was your black vest.... :)
I am the same way.
Totally look at the world differently now. I have had lots of encounters where I walk away scratching my head, did they really mean this? Did they do that because I have a son with a different skin color?
Who knows- their problem but boy, has it opened my eyes.
What a weird thing to say. It's too bad you didn't look confused and say, "Why do you think I want black beans?" Then he would have been forced to explain why. Maybe it was your sweater, or you just looked like a girl who wanted black beans!
As for the relentless rw...bleach kills it. I have had to deal with it in my preschool classrooms and have been known to dab on a little bleach with a q-tip at the first sign of an itchy red bump. (On myself...not the kids!)
Wow! I would had him explain that comment. The world is a cruel place, and I am aware of that. It is now just becoming an eye opener for others.
"Waiting for the world to change"
I just finished reading a book called I'm Chocolate, You're Vanilla and there are many samples of situations that what you just had to deal with and I think you dealt with it beautifully!
It's a book I recommend that everyone puts in their library!
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